April 27, 2010

Top 10 Signs Mommy Needs To Do Laundry

The challenge of folding laundry takes on new meaning when there are little people at your feet who believe “helping” means climbing in the laundry baskets and “folding” means squishing a shirt into a tiny ball as they declare with a grin of accomplishment, “Here, Mommy.” The greatest challenge, however, is that doing laundry is the never-ending task: spend an entire day sorting, washing, drying, folding and putting away clothes ONLY to find with the passing of every hour there are more loads to conquer! And please make sure that disposable diaper doesn’t EVER wander in a load. Thus, are there any reasons why Mommies out there might not find themselves in any number of the following predicaments?

Here are the top 10 signs that Mommy needs to do laundry:

1.) Desperate times mean desperate measures: The only choice of underwear (albeit something that resembles a deflated hot air balloon OR a rubber band) leaves you walking around all day with a wedgie!

2.) Comfort is sacrificed at the door of convenience: Even though your months out from weaning baby, you debate wearing a flapping nursing bra just ignore the now-deflated Madonna-esque protruding cones that enter the room before you do.

4.) Beauty comes second to practicality: You encourage hubby to pull a late-Michael Jackson to the office, wearing the stark white socks with his black pants, because that’s the only choice.

5.) Sharing is no longer optional: You are tempted to put pink socks on baby boy, because that’s what’s available. Besides, pssssst, don’t tell daddy, baby boy has already sported the pink princess pull up a few weeks ago when you ran out of diapers.

6.) Recycling takes on new meaning: No jeans left. Okay, time to pull out those maternity jeans with the yard-long, thick elastic bellyband that makes you appear as though you were ingested by a two-legged octopus.

7.) The Great Osmosis: There are more clothes outside of the dresser drawers and closets than inside.

8.) The Great Invasion: Dirty laundry piles consume almost every room of the house.

9.) The Great Famine: There are not enough laundry baskets or rooms to contain the laundry.

10.) Scarcity Redefined: Finally, the only choice, if you don’t want to wear something with Mr. Poopie, Mr. Booger, or Puke thanks to the munchkins, the only choice is wear nothing at all. Yes, this is the ultimate sign laundry can wait no longer.

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Posted by Laura


Cascia Talbert said...

That is so true in my house! We suffer from number nine all the time, the great famine.

Kate Pantier @ Mommy Monologues said...

OMG--I am literally crying! And rolling on the floor laughing (okay this part isn't literal!) This is MY LIFE right now! I can not get caught up on laundry for the life of me!!! Haven't "talked" to you in awhile! Hope things are going good! Been reading you everyday!